For most IFers, Facebook is a constant challenge in the battle between happiness for people we love, and the feelings of jealousy we try to fight as we watch people live our dream. We love them, we care about them, we're happy for them - we would never, ever, wish them this IF nightmare... Of course not! That doesn't make it any easier, though.
Then the ones who constantly complain about pregnancy - the horrid clothes, that they can't drink, how sick they are of being fat... or who constantly complain about their kids - how awful they behave, how messy it is, how they have to get up every night, how they can't wait for summer to end so the kids will be out of the house... Well, all I can say about all of that is UGH!!! Of course pregnancy and parenting isn't a bed of roses - of course it's tough. Everyone needs to vent and complain sometimes, but I'm talking about those folks for whom sometimes is all the time. Do they have any idea what they have?
Of course, the best tool of an IFer on Facebook is the good old "hide" button! I probably would have deactivated my account if it weren't for that. Anyone who complains constantly (about anything, really, but especially their kids or pregnancy) gets hidden. As do people who I'm not close to, who post all their baby bump pics and ultrasounds and constant updates about their nursery and such. If I'm not close to them, I just wish them well and send my congrats, then hide them. People I'm close to, I keep open - but they're not generally the kind of people would would be constantly annoying to me, anyhow.
Well, so, this last week was interesting because there was the crazy so-called breast cancer awareness fad. Have you seen this? Apparently people are supposed to post the number of weeks they are - based somehow on their birthday - and what they're craving. It's this big - oh so HILARIOUS - thing that is supposedly to bring awareness to breast cancer, even though breast cancer isn't ever mentioned in it and you're not supposed to tell the boys! Ohh, what a fabulous campaign. I bet this really helps breast cancer, a ton! Oh brother!!!
So basically, your newsfeed could be chock-full of what seem like pregnancy announcements, which can obviously be quite painful! Even if you do know what it's about, it's insulting, hurtful, and useless. This isn't going to raise awareness, all it does, in my opinion, is hurt others including breast cancer patients and survivors, who may well have to face infertility themselves, as a result of treatment.
Of course, this has been outrageous to many - and many IFers are striking back with well thought out responses.
As for me, I haven't seen it in my newsfeed even once. What's with that? I have just short of 300 friends on Facebook - and not one of them posted it? That's bizarre!! It's still a puzzle to me, because some of my IF friend's newsfeed were littered with it. I never got the message about the game, and I never saw it in my newsfeed. Maybe it's because I've been a bit looser lately, with letting people know about my IF. This has been mostly a passive thing, but still, anyone who pays attention at all, would have to know. Or maybe my friends are just that awesome!!! I know for certain my close friends are, but I'm still surprised by the numerous others who could have posted it, but didn't. Or, if they did, they blocked me from that one post...
I decided to go look on the walls of my hidden friends - and sure enough, I found it posted on several of their pages. That was pretty funny to me!! The people I hid previously - they're the ones who'd posted it. Pretty awesome, eh? I guess I have some discernment when it comes to such matters!!
Because I never saw it in my newsfeed, I never addressed it, myself. I didn't want to draw attention to it, if people hadn't seen. However, three of my friends did address it - completely unprovoked by me. I never had even mentioned it. One friend put up a preemptive note stating that it's ridiculous and hurtful to many. Another sent me an email warning me about it. A third friend then posted a blog response she'd read from someone in the breast cancer community. I was amazed. Now, I already knew that these are some exceptionally good friends, but still, it was impressive.
Ironically, what could have been just another nightmare Facebook episode was a real blessing! I tell ya -it's a mixed bag out there! Just like life, I suppose! And on Facebook, as in life, I'm glad I've surrounded myself with really good people! What a blessing!
“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art… It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that give value to survival.” (C.S. Lewis)
What a great blessing :) The only people who posted it that I saw were teenagers- who of course thought it was hilarious, and who I was pretty confident were not pregnant. A terrible thing, but a blessing it didn't touch you so much. Praise God for your awesome friends. That is such a cool thing, to have people looking out for us. At present the hide posts from a person button has disappeared- I'm thinking of writing to facebook, it was it's saving grace!
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