Your child can fall out of cart and suffer a serious head injury
So what does a completely sane person do? A completely, or even partially, sane person probably wouldn't even flinch at it - if they even bothered to read it... What do I do? Stop in my tracks and exclaim out loud, "BUT I DON'T HAVE A CHILD!!!"
Why do even the grocery carts have to mock my pain?
In my previous post, I mentioned my "victory" at not crying when a little girl assumed I had kids. I can understand such assumptions from little girls, but grocery carts? C'mon - cut me some slack, cart. Don't you know I'm just walking around trying to hold it all together? Don't you know that grocery shopping is a hotbed of infertile calamity?!?
Indeed, what I wouldn't give to have a kid to place in mortal danger by placing him in a grocery cart.
I sure wish my victories were normal victories, instead of sad little graspings of straw. But since we're counting victories, after standing there with tears in my eyes, staring creepily at the stupid cart, while muttering absurdities, I simply placed my groceries in the car and placed the cart in the corral... After all, I wanted to run it over repeatedly. It would serve both my car and the cart right: as I've mentioned before, I kinda hate my car, too!
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