A kindlier dozen, please

I posted this same poem last new year; it still speaks perfectly to me:

"And ye, who have met with Adversity's blast, 

And been bow'd to the earth by its fury; 

To whom the Twelve Months, that have recently pass'd 

Were as harsh as a prejudiced jury - 

Still, fill to the Future! and join in our chime,

The regrets of remembrance to cozen, 

And having obtained a New Trial of Time, 

Shout in hopes of a kindlier dozen." 

(Thomas Hood)

AF arrived - five days late - on Christmas Eve to destroy any lingering hope that my body can do what women's bodies are meant to do... to destroy any doubt that what so many attain so easily, often without even wanting it, is just completely out of reach for me.  Yeah, I had such high hopes for 2012. Oh I am tired and ready for a New Trial of Time.  In this New Trial of Time, I must learn to let go...  to lay it on the alter....  to trust that it will be redeemed.